DEAR STUDENTS
How are you today? Are you ready for your next task?
You are now saying goodbye to your teenage period. I know that you all love your parents very much. Unfortunately we have all been disappointed sometimes by them. Christopher was no exception. He was a teenager who had to face the life and the fact that some ideas about his parents were shattered. What do you think about his mother and father? How do you think parents can cope with a child like Christopher? How would you feel if you were Christopher? WHO WAS A BETTER PARENT? DO YOU THINK HIS MOTHER DID THE RIGHT THING WHEN SHE LEFT HER HUSBAND AND CHILD?
You can also describe something from the life of somebody (your age) who had to face some difficult moments in his/her life. How did he/she survive?
I am looking forward to your bright and interesting comments!
HAVE FUN!
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19 comments:
I think that parents are the most important persons in our life. They give us so much...and they hardly demend anything in return. Christophers parents are normal, but both of them can't face with C. autism the same.I think that father is dealing with his disability much calmer than his mother.Even though he gets upset some times.he is just a man trying to undrstand his son.But his mother...i just don't get her...how could she done that?ok i think i can imagine how hard it must be to have i child like that but still how could she left him? she said that she thought it would be the best for all...but i don't
think soo...growing up without a mother must be hard.I understand that she left home, because she didn't get along with C.s father but still she could stay closer to Christopher.I think that all of us would like to just dissapear sometimes...run away from all problems...but we can't!we have to be responsible. I know a women who also has a child with dissability...and when she first find out that her child has a downow sindrom...she thought that her life will be over.But she didn't left him alone.He is now in a special institute, and she goes there every day and she spends about 5 hours a day with him and on the weekends he comes home and they are together.He is verry happy child cuz he knows that his mother loves him. And that is
important that we know that parents loves us and that they will stand by our side in every situation!
I think that the parent who leaves feels sorry and guilty. Also C's mother felt like that. It is important that a child has at least one devoted and loving parent.
I'm glad to have heard from you!
Hello...I agree with Maša that parents are the most important persons in our life, because they have thought us almost everything we know an how we are -our personality!Every parent has problems with teenager but dealing with a children who is authistic is even harder. They have special needs so you have to treat them differently. We all make mistakes. I think that most important thing between relationship is comunication. We have to tell our parnents what is bothering us and that`s how they can undertand us and can be better. Christophers` parents are usual parents. We are all scared sometimes and that is the reason why C. mother left. But I don`t say it is right. She should deal with her problems and be honest to her son. I think he would understand, he is a very smart boy. About the father I would say he is also unfair to his son. I know we do things to protect children but hidding the letters of C. mother because of his pain is not right. I don`t know how can you tell your child that his mother is dead if she isn`t. This is not good.
Growing up without mother is very hard, I personly can not imagine it. I think father can be replaceble.I know it sounds like fathers aren`t important , of course they are but mother is more important. But in the book I think father is more important. If he could forget about his wifes mistakes, his anger and dedicate a little more time to his son he would be almost the perfect parent, because he gives Christopher everything he needs.... bye*neža
Being adult and do the right things at the rihgt time or just make a hard decisions in a bad time is not easy. I know that now when I am not a child anymore but also still not an adult. I am in that period when everything seems difficult and confused.
I mean judging someone if he or she did the rihgt decision is silly. We can express our opinion but judging no way.
Christophers' mother took a hard decision. Leaving a husband is one thing but leaving a child just because you can not face with him, becuse you don't know how to be a better parent, is another one. I don't know what i would do if i was her. Perhaps i would just take time for myself, just being alone for a little while so that i could clear my head and perhaps come back.
I mean she didn't leave Christopher all alone but she should tried to keep a comunication with him-the letters are not enough. Every child needs a mother and a father.
You girls are so mature. I think that your parents have done a great job. I can see that they tought you to distinguish between right and wrong. I will tell you a "secret". Even when you are a grown up person things sometimes get complicated and it sounds like a great advice that we should take some time for ourselves and think things over. Both C's mother and father did some really big mistakes. However, they also love their child very much. I agree that running away is the least acceptable solution. But that's what some parents do even if they love their children.
WELL DONE Neža and Alenka!
How can parents react to children`s behavior and how can they show love to him if he has special needs? That is a simple answer, why should you treat him different? In my opinion if you do that, he will feel different, but why should Cristopher feel that way, he isnt really handicap-ed, he just have different thinking. Both parents did wrong and both of them should respect him and treat him like normal kid. C. mother absolutely did the wrong thing when she leaved her kid and husband alone, she is unresponsible and doesnt have enough guts to face a child which needs even more love and patience than other kids.
To Vicious: About parents being the most important person in your life i would say that partly is true but how many people did survive without them, and parents really have biggest influence on you when you have 10 years or less. But when you get older the society does a lot of work on individual too. Society does all the hard work getting you from teenhood to adulthood, and in that phase you will be formed with your characteristics. To Neža : Parents don`t teach you all you know, parents helps you that you grow in a person which is able to be teached furthermore, and i believe that even teachers have bigger influence on your "knowledge" than parents. They only give you instructions how to travel through life to be succesful and happy, what you will learn in life is up to you and your interests.
It is true that you love your child because it is yours. His IQ is not the thing which makes him/ her better,and consequently loved more. But I do not know if everybody agrees.
IQ is basicly something what a group of people came up with (this continue but i will stop at this point). Unfortunatly it is in human nature to make borders and line of what is good, what is bad, what is normal and what is not.
Hypoteticly someone with 130+ is smarter and more capable than me? Yes he maybe is im maths but what does maths help him if he does not know how to change a bulb in his room. So what helps him his 130+ IQ if he cannot study because his room is dark.
Second thing i got through is how can we determin NORMAL? Christopher IS NORMAL in circle of people who are similar to him. Who are we that we can judge a person just because he is not the same as we are? Hell even i am not same than anlenka, luka, neža but in this case am i not normal?
Yes we do "hate" our parents from time to time but no matter what we need to respect them! Who dare to tell your mom or dad to "go to hell" or anything like that? Well I certanly dont. But in terms of todays youth i am in this case on edge of beeing normal. This is what happened to me once when we went out with friends: i said i will be at home aroun 0:00 but we went to Ljubljana and i called my mom that i will be back home at around 2:00 or 3:00 (btw. i was 18 already ;) ) and my friend asked me why do i call my mother to tell her i will be back home later and that he never tells his mother when he will be back home because he is 18 and he is independent. Yes at 18 you are independent but until you live with your parents they have the right to know when are you coming home because they still are your parents.
Well this is my 1st post to this blog and since i realy like it i might post few more.
Take care all!
Well Luka I agree that parents don`t teach us everything,I just wanted to say that they teach you how to be a socialized person. In our first years of life we also develop our personality( if we are shy, calm, agressive, helpfull, ... ), we can change it later but it is very hard, so parents are very imoprtant in our life until we are independant. But I don`t agree that even teachers have bigger influance on our "knowlage". If parents doesn`t push you to teach or if they don care about you,even teacher has no influance. That is dependend on ourselfs, which is an influence of parents in younger ages, we just don`t think that way.
You baceame a great induvidual also by help from your parents. Did you every think about what kind of person would you become if you didnt have parents?
O ya and I think it`s ok if you treat your dishorder child like a normal child partly. But he isn´t normal and people oround know that and that is not good. He has to know he is different, it is easier in life then. you can not just oversight this. ok that is it!bye neža*
ANŽE! Welcome to our blog. I'm glad you like it and hope to hear some more of your interesting ideas. See you.
I agree with Luka. Parents are important people but not always the most important in our lives . Slowly that importancy starts to decrease. The reasons are very different-perhaps we have a lot of arguements with them like a person i know has. Because his parents didn't respect his life, his independence and because they still behave like he is 5 years old, he started to hate them-not like hate but he is avoiding them and the communication between them is very week.
Of course there are also other reasons- we fell in love and the person we love becomes the center of our lives and slowly but surely parents aren't anymore the most important. But we still love them and they are still important-they were there before we were even awaring that we are in this world. And they are always there for us! And all we have to do is ask for help. That is what i like the most about parents-no matter how old you are, you will always be their child:) Because we all are children until we have our parents!
Not all parents are great and every teenager hates his parents, that`s just the way it is! We all do mistakes, but they still loves us no mather what.Me and my mother have a great relationship and she said to me when I turned 18 years old:"I am no longer your mother I`m your friend!"And she really does recpect this. It is important that we also try to understand them.If we don`t mind about them of course relationship wont work.
To Anže: "Unfortunatly it is in human nature to make borders and line of what is good, what is bad, what is normal and what is not."
=> Well, that is called morals. That is a science which teaches you what is good and what is bad. Tell us something new! :=) About the IQ, well surely group of people have came up with that idea, but it can show you how capable you are. To change a bulb you need to be practical, but that has nothing to do with IQ, which is calculated by your logic skills, your knowing of the world around you (if you are well versed ), so partly IQ can be teached and partly is inborn. What I wanted to say is that IQ and being a practical man is not really something u can compare between. Oh and I noticed that you compared IQ with math`s too, that is 2 different idea`s which are in some kind of connection, but still cant compare them. That means if you are a good in Maths that doesnt mean that your IQ is higher, and inversely. About the adventure you had when you went out clubbing, well if you call your mother that is nothing you should be ashamed of, no reasons to be, why? Well parents are people with feelings and fears, so they deserve to know where you are, and when approximately you are coming home so they will atleast sleep well and wont be afraid.
I think that any parent (with handicapped, disabled child or not) should never leave their child. Is it not easier to live with that kind of child, than living away from him and all the problems, but with guilt and bad conscience? But some people are happier that way.
It is important that you have someone, who loves, supports,comforts you and take care of you. It's true, that they don't demand much in return, but the least we can do for them is to respect them and be honest.
In Christopher's case I think, that mother did a bigger mistake, than the father, at least he stayed with him. And although he lied to him, (wich is not right) I think he did his best for Christopher. Maybe he tought, it would be easier for C. if he lives in belief that his mother is dead.
bye bye :)
KAJČI,I WAS LOOKING THROUGH THE PREVIOUS POSTS AND FOUND YOU, WELL HIDDEN. I really like what you are saying. Parents usually do what they think is the best for their children. Unfortunately we (PARENTS) do a lot of mistakes. SLEEP TIGHT!!
Yes, I wanted to join this blog before, but I've got problems with my computer:) Now it is O.K. so I will write here more often... by by
I think his father did the right thing. At some point of Christopher life he should tell him the truth, but until then he would have to wait, because it would be the best for him.
Anyways, i don't like his mum, she lefted him with another man, she may had some reasons to leave her husband, but there was also child involved.. Father was a better parent
from my point of view, but mother was also good, AFTER the incident with dog and the whole story..but if i was Christopher, that would be too late for me. I wouldn't want to even search for her, if she lefted, she left.
I think that parents are important persons in our life. They give us a lot of things...
You can tell them all your problems with school, friends, boyfriend or girlfriend and so one.
Growing up without parents, special without mother must be very hard. I can`t imagine that must live without them. I don`t know what would I do if they left me...Maybe I would get new parents. Maybe I would live with my relatives. I really don`t know.
But I think that for teenagers are more important their friends.
When I was junger I told all my problems to my mum. But now... I tell everything easier to my friends. They are so old as me (mostly) and they understand me.
Parents often don`t understand their children.
My mother often say that I don`t tell her nothing more. But... :)I still tell them a lot of things but i still have "secrets". :)
Parents are very important but in our age they are not the most important. For teenagers is easier to tell problems to friends or boyfriend or girlfriend.
But I still think that every child must have both parent. Just like this children have real childhood. Which is important for his life in his future.
So, that is my opinion.
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